"Here is the remedy for eliminating all inauspicious things within the heart...

"Here is the remedy for eliminating all inauspicious things within the heart...
...which are considered to be obstacles in the path of self-realization. The remedy is the association of the Bhagavatas." -Srimad Bhagavatam (1.1.18)

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Absolute FREEDOM.

Today I feel like jumping up and down and screaming, "I'm free, I'm free!" (Emily, pictured above, kindly agreed to do this for me). I am celebrating two years of soberness and celibacy. For this, I am completely indebted to a handful of good friends who encouraged and supported me to pursue a life of virtue. However, I am also in anxiety because so many friends of mine are still struggling to put their lives together or struggling to live their lives apart, stuck in the same old patterns of intoxication, ambition, attachment, and aversion.

In the Bhagavad Gita (3.27), Krishna says, "The spirit soul bewildered by the influence of false ego thinks himself the doer of activities that are in actuality carried out by the three modes of material nature." The three modes are described as goodness, passion and ignorance. Those in the mode of goodness seek out intelligence and virtue. Those driven by ambition are highly influenced by passion. Excessive sleep and intoxication are characteristics of the mode of ignorance. The three modes of nature effect everything we do or "think" we do. Our thoughts, beliefs, goals in life, actions, questions, the people we are attracted to, the food we eat, even the religions we believe in or choose not to believe in, are determined by the influence of the three modes which manipulate, pollute, and smoother our minds and intelligence.
The path of self-realization begins by understanding and observing the workings of the three modes in our daily activities. The goal is to become aware and learn how to transcend the modes all together. Everyone talks about the political agenda this, the corporate agenda that, but who actually realizes that the participants in these agendas are also unconsciously enslaved by the three modes. So if we really want to be free, we've got to learn who is actually pulling the strings of those who pull the strings.

Free your mind, for what? To take more intoxication and become further entangled in the web of unrequited sense enjoyment? It's more like, observe your mind by using your intelligence, control your mind by controlling your senses. And then the most amazing thing happens. You can actually live in peace with the satisfaction of knowing that this new found mental clarity will enable you to make the right decisions to guide you wherever you need to go to become the best possible person you can be and live the best possible life there is to live.

So this is dedicated to all my beautiful friends out there who are feeling stuck or overwhelmed and needing direction. I'll give you the advice that was given me from a dear friend who sat me down and said, "For now, just try to live your life purely, then you'll understand why later."

Saturday, September 13, 2008

What's everyone waiting in line for?

Welcome to Krishna Lunch. How may we serve you?This is it- an exclusive insider's look- the famous Krishna Lunch, now serving over 1,000 plates of vegetarian goodness to starving and impoverished college students at the University of Florida at Gainesville. In its thirty year history on campus, once the university administration threatened to stop the program because it was getting too big, but the students protested and Krishna Lunch remains a fixed element on campus.Features include: vegan options, free seconds, thirds, even fourths, until you waddle like a duck.The steady kirtan crew sets the mood for a transcendental lunch experience.What is in that salad dressing anyways?Srila Acharyadeva's class, Regions of India, is the most fascinating class I've ever been in. It's not too often you get to talk about the nature of existence and the science of being in a university setting. I have been steadily recording the classes and posting them online. You can listen to them here. This is a must educational experience for the aspiring transcendentalist.Living in the ISKCON Gainesville seminary has been a blessing for my devotional life. The classes are stimulating, the students are enthusiastic, and the atmosphere is all about family. Pictured above are Bhaktin Emily and Bhaktin Kelly. As the women's ashram leader, I am responsible to make sure all the ladies in the ashram are happy, stimulated, motivated, reading and on time to the daily morning and evening program.Sometimes I have to get heavy with them when they roll their eyes at me. But I don't budge an inch. I don't care what you ate last night, 3:30am is a perfectly reasonable hour to wake up in the morning.Bhakta Andres is another seminary student living at the center. His father came and visited over Janmastami and left crying, thanking us all over and over again for giving his son such an amazing opportunity. He never imagined spiritual life could be so blissful. Srila Prabhupada says, "Devotional life is NOT static, it's ECSTATIC!"Every day we read, translate and study various, ancient Vedic texts discussing the bhakti yoga tradition, including the Srimad Bhagavatam, Bhagavad Gita, and Krsna Book. With over 800 devotees living in the Gainesville-Alachua metropolitan area, there is no shortage of senior association and thus guest teachers are frequent. We are so fortunate. Occasionally, I am asked to give class. This is the best service because the best way to learn is by teaching. In the purport of Srimad Bhagavatam 1.1.7, Srila Prabhupada explains, "One can assimilate the knowledge of the revealed scriptures only by hearing and explaining."

The Srimad Bhagavtam is a historical epic. It starts off approximately 5,000 years ago, in the forest of Naimisaranya, where a group of sages have gathered to hear from Suta Goswami, the most learned and respected sage amongst them. The sages elegantly proceed to ask a series of six questions. The first question is a request for Suta Goswami to explain, in an easily understandable way, what is the the highest occupation for a person who seeks the ultimate good for all of society.

On this particular morning, I was explaining the verse 1.2.6 in which Suta Goswami begins his response. In addition to teaching, I continue to assist Srila Acharyadeva and cook for him when he lets me. This was part of a series of salads named after a series of hurricanes that passed through the area a couple of weeks ago.
And in the meantime, Sri Sri Radha Shyamasundar tolerate my inconsistencies and allow me to serve in the capacity I can.

Friday, September 5, 2008

Ithaca is GORGE-OUS!

The only thing more beautiful than Ithaca, NY is the people who live there. After the family reunion, I decided to spend a week in Ithaca. My old boss, John, at the ABC Cafe welcomed me with a giant plate of prasadam. It was African night.
I have so much to learn from my friends. My buddy, Josh, is a permaculture freak. We spent the day on his land, ooing and awing his garden and then took a short herb walk through the woods, rich with Elder berries, Blue Cohosh, Bloodroot, Pawpaws and Hepatica.
This spring Josh started cultivating shitake and reishi mushrooms by drilling holes in oak logs harvested from his land and filling them with spore-laden "plugs". The crew formed an assembly line and pulled the logs out of the pond after a week-long inoculation period. Harvest starts next year and will continue for up to 3 years.
A rare photo of a newly initiated mushroom log in its natural habitat. Oh, the thrill of stalking the wild mushroom- curbing carnivorous tendencies.
The first raspberry of the season. I made a simple offering back to Krishna then popped little red into my mouth, the whole time smiling with ubolic devotional tendencies running through my heart. And who did I find next door? Brother blackberry darshan, a sure cure for city slumber and dormant taste buds.What would be a trip to Ithaca without spending time with Dunkelman and Astra. These are two of the more outrageous spiritual-minded women you'll ever meet. Dunkelman leans towards the Vipassana, and while Astra does have Buddhist tendencies, her heart is more into shamanism.I spent two days with Dunkelman at the Zen Retreat Center she has been working at this summer. Folks come for 10-day healing sessions that revolve around the detox method as prescribed by Ann Wigmore. One of Dunkelman's duties is to prepare the "party packs" which are actually DYI enema kits. The retreat diet is mostly raw, lots of spouts, wheatgrass juice, and something called energy soup.Fortunately, I was visiting during an interim break between retreats and was, thus, able to offer some service and cook for all the staff members. Kichari and chapatis for breakfast, and homemade "guru-approved" veggie burgers, whole wheat buns, fresh garden salad, and lemon-tahini dressing for lunch.
Belly certification. Heart purification. On Indian night at the ABC cafe, I was able to offer kirtan, singing the glories of Krishna, during dinner in the restaurant side of the cafe. Dunkelman even decided to skip dinner and chant with me the whole time! The entire staff from the Zen Center showed up and asked lots of questions in between bhajans. At the end of the night, after four hours of chanting, Dunkelman was glowing. Notice her instrument of choice: old school spoons. Some fight revolutions with pens and others with swords, but this revolution is fought with spoons!
And here's the little man who only three short years ago, appeared in this world surrounded by the prayers of a home birthing support team, including Astra and myself. Elijah is a terror on his scooter but a whimp in the water. His mother and my dear friend, Danielle, is more beautiful than ever and even sweeter than her homemade peach pie. We talked a lot about heart break and the importance of goddess worship while I was in town. My main point was that if you could have a personal relationship and receive guidance from the topmost, Supreme Goddess, why not jump on that opportunity in a second. I explained that the "Hare" in Hare Krishna refers to this Supreme Mother, Hari, and that we ask for her guidance and direction by chanting the Hare Krishna maha mantra. The necessity of women taking shelter of our Supreme Mother has never been so apparent as present day when marriages dissolve faster than Emergen-C packets.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Why do you DO what you DO?

I just entered a few photos into a Burning Man photo contest called "Why do you DO what you DO?" which is a really excellent question to ask ourselves at every minute of the day. That's actually why I started chanting HARE KRSNA in the first place. You can check out my entries and explanation here.

Thursday, July 31, 2008

And then there was many.

OK! Everyone, say sOYcHeESe!
This is my beautiful family. I am fortunate in that my service for Srila Acaryadeva has allowed me just enough time to fly back to Buffalo, NY and hold my three new nieces and nephews for the first time.

My sweet, sweet Ella. Just a few months back, she was in the hospital with tubes poking out of her every which way and trapped inside a lonely, plastic bubble. At that time, I was only allowed to hold her little fingers by reaching through a tiny arm flap on the side of that bubble. We prayed and prayed and now she is Krishna's miracle, sweet as they come and satisfied by watching the world around her. And here is my amazing sister, Nicole, who somehow made it through the trauma of having her precious little girl in the intensive care unit for the first month of her new life. Nicole is a natural at this mom stuff.
Todd is my brother-in-law. He is an expert at giving Ella her evening bath. I don't know how the three of them survived that first month, but they pulled through elegantly. Becoming a parent is one way to become truly self-less in a selfish, selfish world.

My Dad and Heather (AKA Pops & Mops) are proud as can be. Heather is an old pro, having had two babies of her own. She's got the magic touch only moms can have. Here's my little man, Mr. Zach. Good thing he's so freakin' cute cause he likes to cry, and he like to cry A LOT! April describes his personality as rugged yet sensitive. Zach's partner in crime and twin sister, Ms. Maya here, looking like an angel. It was so special to spend time with these guys. They live in Santa Cruz, California so darshan is few and far between. My favorite time with the babes was chanting HARE KRSNA together. It's fun having a little buddy to pray with until....until he wakes up screaming with a disaster diaper and a killer stomach ache. It's gotta be rough having no sense control or control of your bodily functions. This is truly the definition of MENTAL. It rubs off on the caretakers too.
But don't worry, April, there is a special place in heaven for mothers of twins.
It was a special treat to see my Gram and Grumpa, meeting their great grandchildren for the first time. We know they're not ours but family means special connection, a closeness and an unconditional love that, in our finer moments, we might strive to give others outside our limited identification of family. Temporary as it is, I sure love my beautiful, beautiful familia.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Beverly Hills 90211

Welcome to ISKCON Beverly Hills, 153 N. Arnaz Dr. Certainly, if everywhere else, why wouldn't the Hare Krishnas be in Beverly Hills? I came out two weeks ago after leaving Athens and celebrating Ratha Yatra in Atlanta, GA. To my surprise the neighborhood is lovely and quite charming, even for a minimalist like myself. Here at the Arnaz Ashram, the devotees can be themselves and we have lots of fun. Pictured above are two of my godsisters, Krishna Priya and Dhanya. Both have been staying here at the house and doing lots of service.I've quickly resumed kitchen duties, cooking and preparing the finest in gourmet, vegan cuisine. Lately, I've been making Tempeh Reuben Sandwiches to the delight of the devotees. Since I am lacking in many other categories, I feel cooking is one of the best ways I can express my love and gratitude. Since my teacher, Acaryadev, has arrived, he has been busy writing and giving classes. Lately, he has been giving lectures to audiences around the world, including Columbia, Brazil, Mexico, and Ukraine, via Skype. It is wonderful to see how excited the devotees are to have virtual darshan with Acaryadev.My friend Manjari from Moscow came to visit for the weekend. She has been sharing Krishna Consciousness through musical venues for the past decade. Here she is singing a bittersweet bhajan, lamenting the loss of great spiritual personalities when they die. Not all fun and games here. Lots of time to think, read, contemplate, chant, wonder, and pray.The schedule here at the ashram is 4:30am wake up, 5 o'clock morning kirtan, 5:30am japa walk. Since Acaryadev grew up in LA, he knows all the best places to go walking. He has taken us all over Beverly Hills, into Beverly Woods where he grew up, Cheviot Park and Santa Monica where Srila Prabhupada used to walk, UCLA, Rodeo Drive, and my favorite, Franklin Canyon Park.The amazing thing about LA is that, despite the material insanity, traffic, and sprawl, there are beautiful neighborhoods with nice old houses and lovely gardens. Carob trees, Oleander, Southern Magnolias, Drake Elms, Southern Sycamores, Canary Island Date Palms, and Mexican Fan Palms are but a few of the diverse numbers of trees that line the streets here in Beverly Hills. Acaryadev is constantly being visited by his disciples, well-wishers, and neighbors. He really is the life of the party. Hey, who invited the guru, smiling like anything? I hear he only buys his dhotis on Rodeo Drive.But, alas, every party must come to an end and then we must say goodbye. Every party? Anyways, after Acaryadev left, we started organizing for a big move out of the house and into a smaller and more efficient studio space down the road.Moving is one of the more hellish experiences I've been privileged to endure in this lifetime, but when you have good help and conversation, work goes by fast. On Srila Bhaktivinoda's Disappearance Day, Taruni prepared a feast. Taruni and her husband, Jagatpati, are visiting from Australia after a month stay in a cancer treatment clinic in Tijuana. Jagatpati is being treated for a brain tumor that was removed two years ago and has since grown back. They are amazing folks and their life revolves around distributing pure food, as they own a restaurant back in Cairns, Australia. Their immense struggle continues and, yet, they only inspire those who have the honor to be in their company.
The meal has been offered, the table is set, and the garland has been strung. But when will the guest of honor be arriving?
Jaya Srila Acaryadeva! When the teacher is pleased, the students are ecstatic. There are so many wonderful people to meet in this world. Who will show up next at our door?